note: if you wanna skip all this commentary crap and cut straight to the song, scroll down.
– – – – – – – – –
Last winter, I decided it was time to say good bye to my old M-Audio keyboard. The bright idea to sell the thing was predicated on the proposition that I would soon be in a position to upgrade my computer system in its entirety and enter the world of utter Garageband kick-assedness.
Said upgrade was not in the cards, and I found myself standing at the brink of fall still muddling through with flagging technology and sorely missing the keyboard I so prematurely sent into the craigslist ether.
I was a bit amazed and perplexed. I didn’t think that I would miss noodling around in Garageband as much as I did. I guess that’s why I thought it would be no biggie to hawk the keyboard. I hadn’t realized just how much I’ve come to rely on it. To calm me. To help me work through things. To inspire me.
It’s a strange life, this living into one’s dream. One side-effect is that my fun is also my work. That means I get to do it all the time. The other edge of the sword, however, is I never quite get away from it, either. What was my "hobby" has become my vocation. Which begs the question, "What do I now do ‘just for fun?’"
The music had become that for me. It was the thing that I did just for me, with no preconceived notions of fame and fortune behind it. And that made it even more–I don’t know what the word is…special? No…compelling? Unique? No… I’ll have to get back to you on that one–than even my writing. Regardless, it’s something upon which I had started to rely. And it’s something that filled me up.
And it’s something that I feel like it was something at which I was improving. Although I would, by no means, qualify myself as very good, much less great at it, I would say that I was starting to get a feel for it. For what it was, I could live with the results. It was the process, though, that made it all worth it for me. Getting lost in it provided me immense satisfaction.
Strange…the thought that just occurred to me is that the process is a lot like screenwriting. Hmmm…I won’t go there. Pretend I didn’t say that.
Anyway, I found I was missing it. I found that there was a hole in my life where it had been, and I was worse off for it.
Then…a few weeks ago, Dean, Pete, and I were at Dean’s house. We were rehearsing for shooting our upcoming streaming video series for SagePresence, and what did I spy gathering dust in the corner of his family room? The same type of M-Audio keyboard that I had gotten rid of last winter.
I asked him if he was using it. The answer was (no pun intended) music to my ears.
"Using what? Oh…that? No…not really. Well, never."
Next thing I know I was heading home with the thing ticked under my arm and on indefinite loan.
The difference it made was virtually instantaneous. As soon as I got home, I launched GarageBand and started futzing around. There it was, that stirring. The smile on my face. The warm glow in my chest.
In honor of this homecoming of sorts, I decided to write and record a song. Of course, it’s inspired by my muse. One day, I am certain I will write a song about pencils or world hunger or something, but for now it seems appropriate to wander around in this space. After all, if music is the language of the heart…
I am pretty happy overall with this little ditty, which I call "Just Breathe". I believe it demonstrates another big step forward in my understanding of both the craft of songwriting and the tools I am using. I know that I am still at the starting line on both, but I feel like I am learning and that it shows.
The only thing I am really dissatisfied with is the vocals. When I hear them, I cringe. My next purchase will be a better microphone and interface for my computer, so I can record vocals without having them either sound like crap or over-modulating. The vocals on this version are the second draft scratch track, but I got frustrated trying to make them work to my liking. Subsequent takes sounded even worse, so I decided to screw it and leave it as is till the day I could do it right.
So here it. I hope you enjoy it as much as I enjoyed putting it together.
Another one for my baby.
Hey, darlin’
Don’t fret
This ain’t over yet
Hey, baby
It’s all right
Even if it takes us all night
We’re gonna close the distance
Between me and you
We’re gonna come together
We’re gonna learn to live what’s true
Just breathe
Trust me
Trust you
We can make it through
More walk
Less talk
Less push and shove
More makin’ love
Hey, darlin’
What gives?
We cannot change the things we did
But, baby
Why say
Our better days are miles away?
Could it be, baby
We’re already there?
Could it be, maybe
All we need is some air?
Just breathe
Trust me
Trust you
We can see this through
More walk
Less talk
Less push and shove
More makin’ love
Where does the love go?
How does a heart know
When the sun will rise?
The night is dark
There’s no end or relief in sight
Along the way
It’s everything we can do sometimes
To keep our faith
We stumble to the light
And hope we make it right
Hey, baby
Don’t cry
This isn’t about good-bye
So, darlin’
Just smile
And come and sit with me awhile
We’re gonna close the distance
Between me and you
We’re gonna come together
We’re gonna learn to live what’s true
Just breathe
Trust me
Trust you
We can make it through
More walk
Less talk
Less push and shove
More makin’ love
Could it be, baby
We’re already there?
Could it be, maybe
All we need is some air?
Just breathe
Trust me
Trust you
We will make it through
More walk
Less talk
More makin’ love
Less push and shove
Just breathe
Trust me
Trust you
We can make it through
More walk
Less talk
Less push and shove
More makin’ love
True Life 